Yesterday, I asked a few of my friends a very weird question.
If you had to say one real thing that connects with me, what would it be?
The answers were pretty funny, some of them were heartwarming and some of them very, very surprising. It’s interesting how everyone sees you in a different way and associates you with different things. If you have a blog – or even just for fun – definitely try it on your friends. However, no more waiting, let’s have a look at what my friends said:
“Well, it’s hard. Probably geocaching or the hat you used to wear in the winter. Also Doctor Who, books… and vegetable, cause you’re vegetarian!”
This answer basically sums up everything you could possibly say about me. It was not a one thing – which was what I asked for – but nevermind. It’s obvious, that this person is a good friend of mine, because I can’t deny a single thing named in the answer.
“Hey, definitely a book!”
Well, yeah. Books are kinda big part of my life. I read them, I try to write them and when I’m passing by a bookstore, there’s 99,9% chance I’ll go inside, even if I don’t have money to buy some book.
“I think about chocolate… or a gecko.”
Yay, chocolate! However, I guess that was not meant on the amount of chocolate I eat, but it’s a reference to Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, because in fact, Charlie goes to the factory on 1st February, which is my birthday! And gecko? Probably because I love them and I would love to have one.
“Yay, probably a bike or a camera.”
The person behind this answer is an old friend of mine. We don’t really spend much time together, but in the summer, we usually go on bike trips and we shoot photos together, so that’s where the answer comes from.
“I don’t know… a box?”
“A box? Why?”
“You do that thing… you’re looking for boxes, don’t you?”
“Oh, you mean geocaching?”
“Yeah, that’s it.”
Well that… was my exboyfriend. Doesn’t know me really well, does he? 😀
“We have a connection. That sums up everything.”
“Oookay, and a real existing thing?”
Ladies and gentlemen, this is one of my best friends and this is what she associates with me. Shouldn’t I feel offended? I guess I shouldn’t. I didn’t want to publicize it at first, but then I thought whatever, because to be fair, vodka caused our friendship, I’d say. We were kind-of best friends, but it started to get bigger when we started to go on parties and we met vodka. So… yeah, that’s it. Thank you, vodka, for putting us together.
“The snowman you gave me last year at Christmas.”
That was one of the best answers. Finally someone’s written something really… mine. I mean, yeah, all the things – books, geocaching, vodka, chocolate and so on – are fine and they are associated with me and I’m definitely not ashamed by being the person behind them, but I would like people to associate me with something great. Something meaningful to them. The snowman was 100% mine (okay, with a little help from my mum) and it is something I would like people to remember. I always do my best to make the present I’m giving personal – so I choose something the person would love to have or I just make the present by myself, with my own hands.
“Cause you’re strong, fighting for what you want and that’s what I like about you.”
Now… this answer surprised me the most. The person who’s written it, isn’t even a friend of mine. A few years ago, we used to go to the same school. I was the quiet one, not really skinny with a big forehead and undershot and he was basically the “king” of the class. He used to make fun of me and he was really mean. We also argued several times, but he always won. I hated him. I was calling him the way I wouldn’t call anyone else and I was also mean to him, but that was because he was mean to me. I couldn’t even look at him without wanting to punch him. However, one day, I’ve decided I want to end it and so I texted him saying something like:
“I know you hate me, so do I. I don’t know what has happened to you, that you’re so mean and so cruel, but whatever it was, I’m sorry. I wish we could just be normal schoolmates – no hate between us. I know a lot of things happened and I know you’re probably not going to stop making fun of me, but I believe you can change. This is your chance. I forgive you for everything you’ve done and for everything you’ve said. Now, it’s time to start once more.”
And he answered:
“Nice to meet you. I’m Teerp.”
“Ronnie, nice to meet you.”
We stopped hating each other and we started to chat. We never really became friends, but I guess that was not the point. The point was, we started over, giving each other a second chance to prove we’re different.
And so, when I texted him, giving him the question about a thing he links with me, he said boxer gloves. Because I fight for what I want. That was… brathtaking. If I think about all the struggle we had between us, all the years we hated each other, the hard path to where we are today – it’s a miracle and I can’t believe it.
What should you learn from this? The lesson is that you should care about what people think of you. You should see the impact you leave on people you meet – even if it is a stranger on a street. A simple smile can mean so much to them. However, these are not only strangers you should care about. It’s your family and your friends who are the most important. Think about how you act to them, what you say. I have to admit, this is one of the most self-irritating things about me – I often say things I don’t really mean the way I said it. Usually, I’m being ironic, but people don’t get it so they get offended or I say something really bad and don’t think about it and it hurts people’s feelings. I would like everyone to know that I really am sorry – if there’s someone who hates me for my sins the most, it’s me. It happens so many times, that I disappoint myself and the people around me, but I’m always the only one, who is sad about it the most. However, this is me, this is how my brain and mouth work together and although I’m not always saying and doing the best things, I’m trying… and I believe that counts. So get your stuff together and do the same. You may not be the best role model, you may not be successful and loved by everyone around you. You may not be who everyone thought you were. As long as you stay true to yourself and stay critical about your faults, it’s okay. Also, stay developing yourself. Don’t stop until you’re the best possible version of yourself. Don’t try to be someone else, looking up to the person like to a role model. Be the best version of yourself and become a role model. This is what you have to do.